THE IMPORTANCE OF DOING NOTHING!
Why do we always feel starved for time?
Feeling starved for time is often due to having expectations and assumptions about what we should accomplish on a given day. We've been lead to believe that doing more, having more, getting more and knowing more = A better life. As a result, our minds are always moving forward, and as a result we are always on the move, and thinking about what we need to do next.
As a result:
We have become really, really bad at just doing nothing.
Look around: We reach for our smart phone the moment we wake each morning, or while standing around waiting for a bus. Just consider the following fascinating studies where the research subjects were put alone in a room, with nothing to do;
In 11 studies, it was found found that participants typically did not enjoy spending 6 to 15 minutes in a room by themselves with nothing to do but think. They enjoyed doing mundane external activities much more, and that many preferred to administer electric shocks to themselves instead of being left alone with their thoughts. Most people seem to prefer to be doing something rather than nothing, even if that something is negative.
Many people (67 percent of men and 25 percent of women, to be exact) actually gave themselves painful electric shocks instead of just sitting there doing nothing—after they had indicated to the researchers that they would pay money NOT to be shocked again in a previous experiment. One guy shocked himself 190 times in 15 minutes!
Stillness, or the ability to just sit and do nothing in silence, is a skill. As a culture we’re not practicing this skill much these days. When we are incapable of sitting in stillness, we feel uncomfortable when we have downtime. As a result, when we have the possibility of downtime, we cancel it out by seeking external stimulation, which is usually readily available in our purse or pocket. Instead of just staring out the window on the bus, for example, we read through our Facebook feed. We check our email waiting in line at the grocery store. Instead of enjoying our dinner, we mindlessly shovel food in our mouths while staring at a screen.
This might seem relatively harmless, however there is a problem with this unconsious habitual behavior: We human beings need stillness in order to recharge our batteries. The constant stream of external stimulation that we get from our televisions and computers and smart phones, which seem gratifying in the moment, ultimately causes what neuroscientists call “cognitive overload.”
This state of feeling overwhelmed impairs our ability to think creatively, to plan, organize, innovate, solve problems, make decisions, resist temptations, learn new things easily, speak fluently, remember important social information, and control our emotions. In other words, it impairs our ability to perform efficiently and effectively in everything we need to do in a given day (Goleman, Daniel. Focus: The Hidden Driver of Excellence. New York: Harper, 2013).
But wait, there’s more: We only experience a sense of true happiness and real gratitude, along many other positive emotions that make our lives worth living, by actually being in touch with our emotions. In an attempt to avoid the uncomfortable feelings that stillness can produce, such as the panic we feel when we aren’t getting enough done, we end up numbing ourselves to the ‘positive’ feelings in our lives. Research suggests that being present to what we’re feeling and experiencing in the moment, whether it be good or bad, is better for our level of happiness in the long term.
Here’s the main take-away: If we want to be high-functioning and happy, we need to re-learn how to be still. When we feel like there isn’t enough time in the day for us to get everything done, when we wish for more time… we don’t actually need more time. We need more stillness. Stillness to recharge. Stillness so that we can feel whatever it is that we feel. Stillness so that we can actually enjoy this life that we are living.
So if you are feeling overwhelmed and time-starved: Stop. Remember that what you need more than time (to work, to check tasks off your list) is downtime, without stimulation.
The antidote
As a society, we don’t just need to learn to tolerate stillness, we actually need to cultivate it. Fortunately, it’s not complicated. It does however require some discipline, focus and practice. The following are some examples of practicing the important and long lost art of stillness.
Try driving in silence, with your radio and phone off. (Encourage your children to look out the window while you drive them, instead of down at their devices.)
Eat meals out of the sight and sound of your phones and televisions. Make an effort to taste your food. Not just the first few bits, but rather the whole meal.
Take a walk outside every day, preferably in nature, without a phone or music player.
When you first wakeup in the morning, simply lay still and just notice the silence around you, and the sensations within your body.
Try a mindfulness meditation exercise, 10 - 60- minutes. Using a guided meditation audio recording will help you focus, and with each practice comes the ability to bring our attention to the present moment.
If it’s hard, just try a few minutes at a time, adding a few minutes each day. Just practice; it’ll get easier, and the benefits will become more apparent.
Written by: Jeremy Limpens
